what am i to do wif m'self??

I.....am not satisfied with myself.....
i know i should study hard, real hard as e first trial is jus like....1 month away n i'm still slackin like it's my honeymoon year. D*mn!!! what's e hell wrong with me.
I've tried to study, really force myself to look at e books but jus end up drooling over e book or having my attention divided to sumwhere else....
i jus can't concentrate...n i dunno y.....
ya.....my frens ask me to study, my teacher ask me to study(u'd better hang urself if u don, he says), my parents of coz-also ask me to study....sigh...as if i don wanna study.
it's not that i don wanna study alright?!? jus that i really can't get myself to study.
i don wanna play, i don wanna slack of, i don wanna spend most of my time sleeping, i don wanna face this comp and blog.....i wan to study, i rally really wan to.....i know the consequences of not studying....it's my future....i worry about my STPM too.....but well......sigh......
I'm a useless brat.....i hate myself....good for nothing....##$%@&*^%.....